RETRO-ACTIVE: THE BEST FROM THE CINEMA RETRO ARCHIVES
BY LEE PFEIFFER
One of the few remaining Steve McQueen films not available on home video finally comes to DVD with Warner Archive's release of the 1961 military comedy The Honeymoon Machine. Sadly, the film can only be recommended to McQueen fans who feel obliged to buy the DVD in order to keep their collections complete. The movie is an embarrassing fiasco that might have been excusable had it been produced by a low-rent film studio. However, MGM backed this turkey and it must have seemed pretty stale even during its release back in the JFK administration. It's worth contemplating that America's obsession at the time with showing respect for any aspect of the military extended to many films that was neutered for fear of offending Pentagon brass. Sure, screenwriters could denote some highschool-like upstarts in the Army or Navy, and the top brass might be seen as humorless stiffs, but studios rarely wanted to tweak the powers-that-be, lest they not get cooperation from the military for their war movies. In fact, it wasn't until The Americanization of Emily in 1964 that the glass ceiling was truly broken and the U.S. military could be the object of outright satire and cynicism. From there, the floodgate opened and by the late 1960s and early 1970s, films like Kelly's Heroes and M*A*S*H went to the opposite extreme and portrayed the American military as primarily comprised of dolts.
The Honeymoon Machine was made during the era when servicemen were portrayed as overgrown kids whose most dangerous exploits were acting like the kind of towel-snapping wiseguys you encounter in locker rooms. In this ill-advised opus, McQueen- in one of his first starring roles- is a Navy lieutenant who teams with civilian scientist Jim Hutton to come up with a scientific method of predicting how roulette wheels can be manipulated. When the fleet pulls into Venice, the theory is tested at the local casino, where McQueen and Hutton break the bank. Unfortunately, through a convoluted sub-plot, their shenanighans are mistaken for espionage activities and a Cold War crisis ensues.
Director Richard Thorpe, working from a non-screenplay by Lorenzo Semple Jr., encourages a talented cast to overact shamelessly. McQueen is reduced to falling over sofas and engaging in the kind of broad comedy that would never be his strong suit. The iconic actor was always more at home playing a wiseguy who can dispense with a few well-timed quips. Here, he is consistently subjected to over-the-top situations and looks understandably uncomfortable. Among the other victims: Jim Hutton is similarly misused, Dean Jagger portrays the slow-buring admiral whose daughter (Brigid Bazlen) McQueen is romancing and has little to do but pace around rooms shouting instructions at subordinates. Even the talented Jack Weston is humiliated, playing a drunken sailor who inadvertently becomes embroiled in the gambling scheme. The only people to emerge relatively unscathed are Bazlen and Paula Prentiss, who was among the most watchable comedic actresses of the 60s. Here, she generates a few of the film's genuine laughs by playing a beauty whose reluctance to wear eye glasses results in some crazy cases of mistaken identity.
Most disturbing about the film is how little production values MGM invested in it. The movie's limited scope makes one of those beach comedies of the era seem to have the sweep of Doctor Zhivago. The entire scenario looks like a filmed stage production, with no exterior shots whatsoever. "Venice" is represented by some old travelogue footage and a cheesy studio pool with a couple of gondolas tossed into it. The action is confined entirely to a hotel suite (boasting some of the worst matte paintings of all time outside on the "the balcony") and the casino, with a couple of cheap sets representing the interior of the naval vessel. Consequently, despite a running time of only 87 minutes, the story moves at the pace of a glacier.
McQueen seemed to have realized the film was a misstep and limited his future comedy performances to Soldier in the Rain (where he was miscast but in a far better movie) and The Reivers, a Faulkner story that played to the actor's low-key style. The Honeymoon Machine has the dubious distinction of being the only McQueen vehicle I could not recommend, even for curiosity's sake.
The DVD includes the original theatrical trailer.
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