BY LEE PFEIFFER
Those delightfully perverted souls at Vinegar Syndrome have delved back into the well to resurrect another interesting artifact relating to retro erotica. "Prisoner of Paradise" has to be one of the most ambitious porn feature films ever made. Released in 1980, it actually had a fairly exotic location and a semi-respectable budget, at least compared to the grindhouse fare that was being churned out back in the day. The film is attributable to one Gail Palmer, who became a bit of sensation for her status as one of the few female directors of porn movies. Here, she is credited with co-directing the film with porn legend Bob Chinn. (It has since been alleged that, in fact, she only served as a front for her then-boyfriend, who was said to be the actual director of the films that bore her name.) "Prisoner of Paradise" presents a bizarre scenario that starts out as a straight adventure film. The ubiquitous porn presence, John Holmes (aka Long Johnny Wadd) stars as an American sailor in WWII. When we first see him, he's washed up on a tropical island. (Yes, the film seems to have actually been shot somewhere more exotic than a bedroom above an L.A. taco restaurant.) Seems Holmes' character, Joe Murrey, is the only survivor of a Japanese submarine attack on his vessel. The film actually plays out as a legitimate survival story for a while, with Holmes' Joe exploring the island, trying to build shelter and identify ways to hunt and find fresh water. In fact, the film moves at such a deliberate pace that it takes a full eleven minutes until the script allows Holmes to reveal his legendary appendage. This is done through the use of flashbacks. We see him interacting with the love of his life, a Chinese girl in an unnamed city, presumably in China. Prior to shipping out to sea, they have an emotional goodbye, as seen in a tastefully directed lovemaking sequence. Minutes later, however, a bombing raid occurs and the girl is killed, leaving Joe emotionally devastated. Now he is apparently the only inhabitant of this remote island and the memories of his love haunt him even further...that is until he comes across the shocking sight of two stunningly beautiful women bathing in a nearby waterfall. Joe follows them and makes an even more shocking discovery: they are part of a tiny Nazi/Japanese encampment. The women are Ilsa and Greta (played respectively by platinum-haired porn icon Seka and Sue Carol.) Turns out that they are Nazi soldiers who have been assigned to this secret outpost along with their commandant, Hans (screen credited as Heinz Mueller. Real name: Elmo Lavino!). Joe observes the goings-on at the camp, which consists only of a hut and small storage shack. The only other inhabitant is a Japanese guard (Jade Wong). The wacky premise is based on the fact that Germany and Japan were allies during the war, but the real reason seems to be a set-up for some inter-racial sexual romps.
Joe is startled to see two captive American nurses (Nicki Anderson and Brenda Vargo) taken at gun-point into the shack where they are sexually abused by the commandant and his two female adjutants, who conveniently turn out to be lesbian dominatrixes. Joe makes a daring attempt to rescue the nurses but they are captured by Suke, the Japanese guard. Brought before the commandant, the trio is subjected to both verbal and sexual abuse- well, at least the women are. Joe's "punishment" is having one of the nurses perform...er, let's call it oral surgery- on him. There are also the prerequisite lesbian sequences. The commandant is total nutcase who is so over-the-top that he makes Werner Klemperer's Col. Klink look like a model of comedic restraint. The commandant toasts pictures of Hitler, even as he condemns him for banishing him to this remote outpost. (Would he really rather have been on the Russian front than on a tropical island with sex-starved women?) Suke makes her predictable intentions known by performing more...er, oral surgery- on Joe, who is tied to a post. During the course of his confinement, he sees the kind of action you used to have to go to Plato's Retreat to experience, yet he is intent on breaking loose. The finale of the film finds Joe successfully freeing the nurses and killing his Axis enemies in a fiery explosion.
What sets "Prisoner of Paradise" apart from most of the porn drivel of this era is the better-than-average direction coupled with a relatively lavish budget. There are some impressive special effects in the finale and the directors even manage to squeeze in an original love song, which isn't as bad as those old lemons by Bread that used to chart in Billboard in the 70s. The battle sequences are shown in flashback and consist of genuine newsreel footage combined with footage from "Tora! Tora! Tora!".
They used to call James Brown "the hardest working man in show business." With all due respect to the Godfather of Soul, I don't think he could hold a candle compared to John Holmes, who was said to have gotten it on with literally thousands of women, all under hot kleig lights in front of a camera crew. "Prisoner of Paradise" at least offered him a change of scenery. The film is rather entertaining in its own bizarre way and the Vinegar Syndrome DVD is impressive. It boasts a fine transfer as well as the original trailer and a gallery of other retro porn coming attractions.